Facing the question: What makes life worth living?

This short story was originally published on the blog — We Are Not Numbers: We are Individuals Trying to Change the World. Check it out here.

Anas Jnena

Facing the question: What makes life worth living?

I first met Ahmed in early 2012, in a small park in Gaza’s Shuja’ya neighborhood – a place where my friends and I usually meet whenever there is a power cut in our neighborhood. The night air was dry and cool and I was waiting for my friends to arrive. On that particular day, however, they were late. Being the person I am, I patiently waited for them. I found a medium-sized rock with a flat surface at the corner of the park and decided to sit while I lost myself in a sea of thoughts. I was planning a prank to scare one of my best friends, Hamza.

In the still darkness, I was sure nobody would ever notice me. I saw someone approaching and immediately thought of Hamza. I could already feel the excitement deep in the pit of my stomach as I imagined his face when I pulled my prank on him. But much to my surprise, I saw Ahmed instead.

That was our first meeting. He said hello to me; I returned his greeting. He looked calm and experienced, even though he clearly was not the educated type. His features were not what you would call attractive, but there was something about his face that captured my attention. I loved the way he smiled; it was sort of crooked, his black eyes got small and his lips curved inward as if he was sucking on a lemon. Even today, whenever I see Ahmed smile, I know it is genuine and not forced. Since Hamza hadn’t arrived yet – though he had promised me he would be on time – I decided to take this opportunity to strike up a conversation with him. It was at that moment I got to know Ahmed, and his life story was something I did not expect.

—

Ahmed is the second-oldest child among 10. He dropped out of school when he was 15. His parents were struggling to keep the family from falling apart, so he decided he too should work and reduce his family’s burden. He started selling newspapers on the streets.

Working in the tunnels was hard work, but it paid well

Unemployment is very high in Gaza; nearly 60 percent among youth. But Ahmed soon was lucky enough to land a better-paying job—as a worker in the smuggling tunnels of Rafah, in the southern part of Gaza, beneath the Egyptian border. Those smuggling tunnels employed thousands of young men whose job was mainly to haul goods—including food, clothing and fuel—into the blockaded Gaza. The work was hard and dangerous; he was assigned a 12-hour shift, six days a week, in cramped spaces. Sudden tunnel collapses, electrocution and Israeli airstrikes were very possible, However, that didn’t stop Ahmed from being a diligent worker. Ahmed was extremely grateful; the pay was around 150 shekels (US$39) per day and he knew that with this job, he could ensure the ones he loved a better future.

There were some very daunting days, when Ahmed decided to spend the night at his work place due to the fact that his home was relatively far from Rafah. He often found shelter at the entrance of the tunnel, and tried his best to get the rest his body desperately needed. Though it wasn’t comfortable spending the night on the ground, far from home in a place where his life was endangered, Ahmed never minded much.

Most of his earnings were used for his family’s expenses, but instead of grumbling about not having much money for himself – as most youth our age do – Ahmed instead felt like he had accomplished something big in life since he had managed to lift some of his parents’ burden. He even gave around $2,000 to his oldest brother for his marriage. I had never encountered someone so selfless, and we became fast friends.

—

Early the next year (2013), Ahmed finally got engaged to the girl he loved. Perhaps God listened to his silent prayers and decided to grant them. He even brought me and some friends some sweets and invited his close friends for dinner.. Seeing Ahmed happy brought light to everyone’s heart. But that event also changed Ahmed a bit. He doubled his efforts and worked twice as hard as he had before. Many of his friends didn’t see him that often anymore, since he was always too busy with work.

Later that year, the unexpected happened. Egypt’s military destroyed most of the tunnels to improve their own security, causing Ahmed and thousands of other young Gazans, to lose their humble jobs. The transition from employed to unemployed resulted in many other changes to Ahmed’s life. He started to spend most of his time in Alshuj’ya Park, becoming more pessimistic and hopeless. He delayed his wedding celebration because he couldn’t afford the expenses. Money that he earned from odd jobs was constantly used for family purposes, until he finally was completely out of cash. Day by day, his financial situation became worse.

The Egyptian military destroyed hundreds of tunnels (Photo by Ahmed Elsherif)

By 2014, Ahmed’s life had completely changed. He couldn’t bring himself to visit his fiancée’s house because he felt ashamed. If he didn’t even have money to provide for his current family, how was he to support a wife and family one day? He felt as if the world had turned sinister and now was laughing at his failure.

One cold and dry night, after the power went out, Ahmed decided to put an end to his suffering. He found an electrical cable and tied it to the ceiling of his room. Ahmed got up on the chair and kicked it away.

But it did not end there.

As if on cue, his sister saw Ahmed hanging and started screaming. Her cries echoed through the house, awakening everyone. Mohammed, Ahmed’s younger brother, was on the scene in a flash—lifting him up to relieve the tension while his sister cut the cable. Ahmed was miraculously saved.

As for me, I could not suppress my confusion and doubt. So I decided to ask him directly: “Why did you do it, Ahmed?” He replied, “It’s because I couldn’t maintain my self-esteem. All doors of hope have been closed to me in Gaza. It is a suspended death to be unemployed.”

Postscript: Since then, Ahmed has survived Israel’s 50-day assault against Gaza (July 8-Aug. 26), and he still has only occasional day work. However, he remains engaged to the love of his life. And I am still his friend

Shuja’ya Park, before the 2014 summer war (photo by Abo Alyan)

Shujaya Park after the war  (photo by Abo Alyan)

Mentor: Leslie Thatcher

Goliath and PEP

The Lensic in Santa Fe holds 821 people but last night I think they must have squeezed in a few more to hear Amy Goodman (Democracy Now) and Max Blumenthal. I only got in because my friend had the foresight to pick up tickets early. If you missed out, I think the program will be available online next Sunday — check here.

Lensic Performing Arts Center in Santa Fe, NM

The focus of the evening was Max Blumenthal’s new book — GOLIATH: Life and Loathing in Greater Israel — Nation Books (2013). Unlike his earlier book — REPUBLICAN GOMORRAH: Inside the Movement that Shattered the Party — which received a boatload of attention from media and talk show hosts, this time the reception in the U.S. has been silence. Amy Goodman interviewed him about his book here and here, but you might be hard-pressed to find any other interviews.

Why the silent treatment, even from some of the “liberal” and “progressive” media? Blumenthal shared PEP with the audience, an acronym I first heard this summer, “Progressive Except Palestine.” I’ve used PEP to describe several Facebook friends who, needless to say, have chosen no longer to be Facebook friends!

I’ve never understood how many self-described “progressives” can have a blind spot when it comes to Israel-Palestine. Last night, I think I came up with an explanation.

Blumenthal described what he witnessed in the Gaza Strip during a ceasefire in Israel’s 51-day assault (“Operation Protective Edge”) this past summer.  I’m still scratching my head, trying to understand how he managed to get into Gaza through the Erez Crossing.

Max Blumenthal, author of GOLIATH

In addition to reciting facts and figures, many Arabic and Israeli names rolled easily off his tongue, as if they were neighbors or good friends. The Gaza fishermen who took him out on the sea one night. Max Steinberg, a Jewish jihadist from Los Angeles, who joined the elite Golani Brigade in Israel and died in Gaza this summer. The men in Gaza who served Blumenthal tea while standing in front of a pile of rubble, their destroyed homes. He mentioned Refaat Alareer by name — a university professor in Gaza and Editor of Gaza Writes Back — and I decided right there and then that I would ask Blumenthal to autograph a book for Refaat which I plan to deliver when I return to Gaza.

Max Blumenthal and Amy Goodman

Blumenthal spent 4 years researching Goliath. About the research, he says:

Thanks to my U.S. passport and Jewish heritage, I have been able to report from the frontiers of Israel-Palestine with relative ease, receiving favorable treatment from ethnic profiling experts at Ben Gurion International Airport, passing effortlessly through checkpoints, and cruising from the West Bank to Tel Aviv on highways made off limits to most Palestinians. I spent months living in Ajami, a rapidly gentrifying Palestinian ghetto just south of Tel Aviv; in central Jerusalem, an increasingly frenetic hotbed of Jewish religious nationalism; and in Ramallah, the occupied, seemingly prosperous capital of a Palestinian state that may never be. I have interviewed leaders of Israeli political parties and leaders of Palestinian protests…These are the stories of people living under a regime of separation, grappling with the consequences of ethnic division in a land with no defined borders.

Imagine 89 families (entire families) wiped out or “liquidated” by the Israeli military this summer. Blumenthal says that raises the question of of genocide. I would agree.

He just returned from the Russell Tribunal, the People’s Tribunal, earlier this month where he presented testimony about possible war crimes. Listen to some of the horrific stories he heard in Gaza. (15 minutes)

Max Blumenthal came under fire from liberal Zionists for portraying Israel in such a critical manner, but Operation Protective Edge has proven him right, and now those liberal Zionists have nothing to say. The reality of Israel today is much worse than what he describes in Goliath.

“The mask is off” Israel now and Blumenthal believes there has been a “massive shift in public opinion in the U.S.”  There are now more Jewish Voices for Peace chapters on university campuses in the United States than there are J Street chapters, whose members have been moving to JVP in droves.

When asked by a member of the audience to speak about AIPAC, Blumenthal acknowledged it was the second most powerful lobby (after the NRA) in the U.S. but it has no base; it’s top heavy and buys off the the elites.

Max Blumenthal autographing book for Refaat Alareer

Blumenthal is a great story-teller (on paper and in person) and his descriptions of Shu’jaya and Rafah and Gaza City drew me back to my Palestinian friends with both great sadness and joy because his experience mirrored so many of my experiences when I lived there.

The evening’s take-away message for me — the one I don’t want to forget — is that there is no hope of reforming the State of Israel or ending the military occupation from the inside. Israel has moved so far to the right politically, and Israelis have been so isolated from Palestinians, that Blumenthal believes they’re preparing for a permanent occupation of Palestine. Force has to come from the outside in the form of the BDS movement, in international public opinion, and from action at the ICC to hold Israel accountable.

So here’s my PEP theory — why self-described progressives can turn a blind eye towards the injustices that Israel’s military occupation is perpetuating on Palestinians.  Some of these PEPs are good Jews who visited Israel during their impressionable years on a “birthright” tour, just like Max Blumenthal did when he was a young man, and accepted without question the “special” stories they heard. To challenge those messages now would (1) make them feel foolish or (2) upset their moral universe in which Israel = good and Palestine = terror/bad.

Psychologically, when someone’s identity is so tied up into a place (Israel), he can’t acknowledge the evil warts that exist in that place without acknowledging his own warts. Even though, rationally speaking, a state and an individual don’t have to be so intertwined, Israeli leaders don’t want any daylight to exist between the State and the good Jew so that they won’t question the actions of the State. And that’s why I fear that my friends and family who find themselves intertwined with the State of Israel in this way are in for a very big fall.

Friends at the Lensic following Max Blumenthal’s presentation.

Letter to Congress from an American in Gaza

This morning I had the opportunity to join a group who met with Representative Michelle Lujan-Grisham (D-NM) in Albuquerque.  She’s a first-term member of Congress who admits her strength is social services and health policies, not foreign policy.

She acknowledges having a high learning curve when it comes to the Middle East, but says she tries to attend every Congressional briefing on foreign policy. She has noticed over the past 6 months that there’s a shift among her colleagues in Congress, they have “a new level of concern” and “want more balanced and clear recommendations.” She leaves these classified meetings now “feeling unsettled.”

When I learned that this meeting in Albuquerque had been organized, I turned to my American friend in Gaza for permission to share some of his photos of the horrific destruction in Gaza.  I gave 22 photos to Rep. Lujan-Grisham, along with a copy of the letter my friend wrote. I hope she reads it and takes it to heart. (The letter is reprinted below.)

Refaat Alareer and Rawan Yaghi meet with Congresswoman Lujan-Grisham (D-NM)

I also shared a photo of a meeting in her DC office this past April with Refaat Alareer and Rawan Yaghi. Refaat is a Professor of English Literature at the Islamic University of Gaza and the Editor of Gaza Writes Back. Rawan is one of his students and contributed a short story to the book.

None of us knew when we met in her DC office in April that Israel would launch Operation Protective Edge a few weeks later, killing over 2000 Palestinians in Gaza. When she saw the photo this morning, Rep. Lujan-Grisham asked if Refaat was OK. I told her that Refaat’s brother was killed this summer and his home was destroyed. She was speechless.

Meeting with Representative Michelle Lujan-Grisham

Even for a strong, articulate politician, there are no words. I hope the news gave her pause to think more deeply about U.S. policy in the Middle East.  I hope she takes the time to read Denny Cormier’s letter.

September 22, 2014

Dear Representative Grisham:

We need your support in Gaza.

My name is Denny Cormier.  I am 68 and am currently retired.

I have lived in Santa Fe for the last 15 years but I am currently volunteering in Gaza as a human rights activist and a citizen journalist reporting on what I am discovering here.

I have been living here in Gaza City for six months now (since March 2014), and I also traveled here in June of 2013 as a citizen journalist.

What I knew about Gaza and the Palestinian issue before coming here was limited to reports that I received from the Western media, and the distance between Santa Fe and Gaza might as well have been a million miles.

But based on many conversations with young Palestinians and university students in Gaza over 2 years, I decided to travel to Gaza myself in 2013 and to investigate personally the differences between my own discoveries and what I read (or saw) in the media.  My personal discoveries and the media narrative were so totally different – in fact, they were totally at odds.  And I had to know.

Frankly, my first visit to Gaza was an eye-opener.  In fact, it was a life changing experience to put it mildly.

I was immediately welcomed as a United States citizen… the people in Gaza love Americans… they welcome me warmly wherever I have traveled in Gaza.   People greet you in the streets with the warmest of welcomes – when they discover I am an American, it immediately brings smiles to the faces of adults and children alike.  The immediate reaction is – We Love You.   I have made many lasting and strong friendships in Gaza.   And I fell in love with the Palestinians and with Gaza.   I received a similar welcome from university students and business owners and from people who welcomed me on behalf of the government.

This was not a place of terrorists.  This was a place of a warm, friendly people – people of great faith – people of generosity that is unparalleled in my experience.

I could not wait to return to Gaza, and did so earlier this year in March.

And I am glad that I did.

This recent 6 month visit has increased my understanding of the issues here, and I have seen how the issues of siege and of economic devastation have brought great suffering to these people, many of whom I know personally.

Although I had the opportunity to leave Gaza before Operation Protective Edge with the assistance of the U.S. State Department and the government here in Gaza, I chose to stay on during the 51 day attack and to be a witness.

What I saw and experienced can only be characterized as horrific.  The attacks on the border cities of Gaza were particularly barbaric.   I reported to representatives of the U.S. State Department that I was a witness to war crimes, and the effects of the war crimes continue even if the attacks have stopped.

Although I live in an area of Gaza where other internationals live and in a place that is normally considered a safe haven for them, I began to feel strongly that my life was in serious danger – that there was no safe place in Gaza during those 51 days.

Gratefully I survived the bombings in my own neighborhood, but not so others in Gaza City and in cities throughout the Gaza Strip.  Many hundreds died in these attacks… many thousands more were seriously injured… thousands of homes have been flattened by the weaponry that Israel used during the attacks and are now sitting in piles of rubble.

I have visited and documented the destruction in three Gaza cities – Khuzaa, in Shujaya and in Beit Hanoun (and of course, in Gaza City).   If you had been able to accompany me on these visits after the war, you would have wept… I did.

What I saw was nothing short of total devastation of civilian homes.  I would be happy to send you photographic documentation if you wish…. But what I saw and witnessed would make you shudder…

I have heard hundreds of stories of people of all ages who ran from  their homes in the middle of the night as shells fell on their homes without warning….others were given just a few minutes to evacuate their homes before rockets or bombs wiped them out…. My dearest friends ran from their homes in bare feet and lost everything they owned and treasured.

Some homes were bombed while the families were sleeping.  They received no warning from Israel.  Entire families were wiped out

Children shuddered in their homes and it has been reported that 90% of the children in Gaza now suffer from PTSD.

Children were particularly targeted in these attacks.

Four young boys from the Bakr family were killed by shells from Israeli gunboats just off shore…. They were killed on the beach when they were playing football very close to my home…  I met the only survivor of the attack on the same Bakr family home just days later.

I spent most of two months during the war acting as a human shield at Al Shifa Hospital, the major health facility in Gaza.  There I met hundreds of refugees and interviewed the injured.  I saw the dead being brought to the hospital, many of them children… what I saw is the stuff of nightmares.   On one of the days there, hundreds of ambulances arrived over several hours delivering the dead and the injured….. The doctors I spoke to have told me that the injuries to their patients were worse than any war injuries that they have witnessed here and in other war zones.

I have seen many destroyed or severely damaged civilian facilities, including schools, mosques, hospitals, police stations – in some cases entire cities.

Before the war I was also witness to the devastation to the economy and to the infrastructure of Gaza – and the destruction of the human spirit during this too long siege.  I learned to live with 8 hours of electricity a day (now 6 hours a day)… I learned to live with the water that comes from the taps that cannot be used for anything safely… I learned to live with miles of beaches that have been destroyed because of the need to dump raw sewage into the sea.  I learned to live with stories of suffering that are caused by a huge unemployment situation in Gaza…

I cannot tell you all that I have discovered first hand during this current visit to Gaza, but it could fill books, and one day it probably will.

I can tell you that what I witnessed are gross breaches of international law and gross breaches of agreements relating to collective punishment of a civilian population.

I can tell you that I will encourage the Palestinians to bring charges against Israel to the International Criminal Court.

I can tell you that it is my honest opinion that the suffering of the people of Gaza are a direct result of an illegal siege and blockade and a de facto Occupation…. The Israelis left Gaza some years ago but they have an immense and negative impact on the lives of ordinary citizens in Gaza long after they left this area and surrounded it with fencing and military outposts.

I can tell you that I was personally shot at when visiting the city of Shujaya.  As I explored the damage and was hundreds of meters from the Israeli border and the buffer zone that they have set up, bullets were fired above me and on both sides of me by the Israelis….. Warning shots perhaps…. But I was nowhere near the area where people are regularly killed and injured along the Israeli border…. My only weapon was a digital camera.   I had to back up several hundred more feet before the shooting stopped.   Children who were in the same area were also fired at as was my guide.

I can tell you many things based on first hand witness and observation,  but I must  please ask you to reconsider anything you ever learned from the media or from the  State Department  or White House regarding  Gaza – in fact, question everything you have been told.

What you have been told… what we Americans have been told…. Is a lie.

I would be happy to meet with you when I return to the United States, but I must warn you now that the ongoing support of the State of Israel in its attacks on the Palestinians, especially on those living in Gaza is a great shame on the American people. The financial support offered to Israel without proper concern and restrictions based on human rights is a great shame for the American people.

As a representative of the good people of the United States, I urge you to look very closely at the good people of Gaza and to reconsider what we have done to them in the name of Israeli security.

In fact, I would be pleased to personally be your guide should you elect to visit the Gaza Strip and should the Israeli government allow you entry for a firsthand experience of what I have witnessed and experienced.

The people of Gaza need your support.

Respectfully,

Dennis Cormier

Santa Fe, New Mexico

(currently Gaza City in the Gaza Strip)

Dear Senator Elizabeth Warren

Dear Senator Warren,

Thank you for your leadership to protect the Middle Class (consumers and taxpayers) and to hold the financial Wall Street titans accountable for their irresponsible greed. Many Americans, including me, have watched your strong advocacy hoping that a new culture of fairness for the “little guy” is finally coming to Congress. You have asked the tough questions that need to be addressed, and you have demanded answers when many of your colleagues in Washington D.C. seemed content to maintain the status quo. Thank you!

Now, I hope you will use the same moral clarity which has guided you on consumer protection issues and turn that moral compass to foreign policy issues and, in particular, to the Palestine-Israel conflict. Just as the financial morass demanded scrutiny beneath the surface, there is much more to the Israel-Palestine conflict than is reported in the general media. My personal education about Gaza and Hamas grew tremendously after spending 9 months (September 2012 – May 2013) teaching in Gaza.

No American politician knows Israel and Palestine better than President Jimmy Carter. I encourage you to invite President Carter to either a personal meeting or a gathering of your peers in Congress to share his experience and recommendations. Ask him your tough questions about the Middle East.

I also hope you will have an opportunity to read the short stories written in English by young authors from Gaza in Gaza Writes Back. I’m pleased to give you this gift with the hope that you will find time, perhaps on your daily commute, to hear from Palestinians about life in the Gaza Strip.

The United Nations Relief and Works Agency issued a report two years ago that Gaza may be unlivable by 2020. The Palestinians in the Gaza Strip have been struggling under Israel’s oppressive economic, political, and cultural siege for 7 years. Movement in and out of Gaza has virtually ceased for most Palestinians and others wishing to visit. The buffer zones imposed by Israel have severely curtailed agricultural production and fishing. The damage sustained from Israel’s past 3 military offenses in Gaza (Dec 2008- Jan 2009, Nov. 2012 and July – Aug 2014) has been cumulative, with families never fully recovering.

American taxpayers support these military operations and Israel’s illegal military occupation of the West Bank and the Gaza Strip to the tune of over $3 Billion per year, far more than any other country receiving US foreign aid. As investors in this long-term occupation lasting more than six decades, Americans have a responsibility to ask if it’s in our best interest to continue subsidizing the occupation or could the U.S. be a more responsible friend to Israel by employing some tough love?

We should demand that Israel stop all illegal settlement expansions in the occupied Palestinian territories, and if Israeli leaders refuse, we should withhold our generous foreign aid. We should not be cooperating in the economic siege of the Gaza Strip, and we should demand that Israel lift it. Finally, we should demand that the illegal military occupation of Palestine end.

You may hear from foreign policy advisers that the geopolitical landscape in the Middle East defies any simple solutions like the three I have mentioned above, but then I hope you will use the same moral compass and independent thinking that you have used on consumer protection issues.

Thank you.

Busboys and Poets and Palestinian writers

Troy Davis executed by the US government in September 2011

I knew Busboys & Poets in Washington DC must be a special place when I saw the Troy Davis drawing on the wall.  Justice and human rights were in the air and the vibes felt really cool.

Busboys & Poets in Washington, DC

This proved to be an excellent venue for the last DC stop on the Gaza Writes Back USA book tour.  The 30-40 people were a friendly crowd and, based on the questions they asked, they were obviously well-informed about Palestine.

Refaat Alareer, the book’s editor, shared how he tried to distract his young children during the 23 days of Operation Cast Lead (Dec. ’08 – Jan. ’09) when “there was no right place, no right time; anyone, anytime, anywhere could be killed in Gaza.”

He would tell them stories, and then he realized the power of stories for connecting the past, present and future. During the bombing, his 5-year-old daughter asked him, “Who created the Israelis?” He was stunned, and couldn’t find an answer to her profound question.

After the death and destruction ended, Refaat returned to his university. The Israeli Occupation Forces had destroyed the large laboratory building on campus, in addition to schools, medical facilities, banks and Mosques throughout the Gaza Strip. He saw the pain and horror in the eyes of his students. No one escaped the trauma of Operation Cast Lead. Everyone had lost a family member, a friend, a neighbor or knew someone who had been seriously injured.

Refaat, the teacher, wanted to help his students find a way to resist. Many of them had been writing on blogs, websites, and Facebook whenever the electricity was working, usually only a few hours each day. He challenged his students to write fiction as a way to release their anger and frustration in a creative way.

Some of their short stories, all written in English, are included in Gaza Writes Back responding to Israel’s attempts to erase Palestinian voices. The book is for his daughter, for Palestinians in Gaza and the West Bank, for the Palestinians in the diaspora, and most importantly, for non-Palestinian audiences.

Then Refaat diverted from previous presentations and read a poem he wrote in 2012,  “I Am You”.  When he finished reading, the woman sitting next to me whispered “Wow!” under her breath.

Two steps: one, two.
‏Look in the mirror:
‏The horror, the horror!
‏The butt of your M-16 on my cheekbone
‏The yellow patch it left
‏The bullet-shaped scar expanding
‏Like a swastika,
‏Snaking across my face,
‏The heartache flowing
‏Out of my eyes dripping
‏Out of my nostrils piercing
‏My ears flooding
‏The place.
‏Like it did to you
‏70 years ago
‏Or so.

‏I am just you.
‏I am your past haunting
‏Your present and your future.
‏I strive like you did.
‏I fight like you did.
‏I resist like you resisted
‏And for a moment,
‏I’d take your tenacity
‏As a model,
‏Were you not holding
‏The barrel of the gun
‏Between my bleeding
‏Eyes.

One. Two.
‏The very same gun
‏The very same bullet
‏That had killed your Mom
‏ And killed your Dad
‏Is being used,
‏Against me,
‏By you.

‏Mark this bullet and mark in your gun.
‏If you sniff it, it has your and my blood.
‏It has my present and your past.
‏It has my present.
‏It has your future.
‏That’s why we are twins,
‏Same life track
‏Same weapon
‏Same suffering
‏Same facial expressions drawn
‏On the face of the killer,
‏Same everything
‏Except that in your case
‏The victim has evolved, backward,
‏Into a victimizer.
‏I tell you.
‏I am you.
‏Except that I am not the you of now.

‏I do not hate you.
‏I want to help you stop hating
‏And killing me.
‏I tell you:
‏The noise of your machine gun
‏Renders you deaf
‏The smell of the powder
‏Beats that of my blood.
‏The sparks disfigure
‏My facial expressions.
‏Would you stop shooting?
‏For a moment?
‏Would you?

‏All you have to do
‏Is close your eyes
‏(Seeing these days
‏Blinds our hearts.)
‏Close your eyes, tightly
‏So that you can see
‏In your mind’s eye.
‏Then look into the mirror.
‏One. Two.
‏I am you.
‏I am your past.
‏And killing me,
‏You kill you.

Questions from the audience followed — “What is the ideal desired outcome of this conflict?”

Yousef responded — “The solution must include the land between the river and the sea. Equal rights for everyone, and the right of return for the refugees to present day Israel. Any other agreement would be a waste of time.”

 

Refaat added — “We’ve given the so-called peace talks enough time. Israel’s working against any possibility of Palestinians having their own state. Israel is pushing Palestinians into a corner — towards violence. Since Israel’s founding, their leaders have used the same strategy of violence, dehumanization and destruction. Palestinians have been responding creatively, using different methods of resistance. Writing, in addition to acting and drama, is another way for Palestinians to express their pain creatively.”

In response to a question about Palestinian stereotypes, Rawan noted — “Fiction erases boundaries and draws us back to our humanity. Our job is to go global, and show the world that we are normal, just like anyone else. The international community needs to be open and willing to learn and hear the Palestinian narrative.”

 

Writing is resistance

The Gaza Writes Back book tour began in Philadelphia but I caught up with them in New York City on Friday night, many miles ago. At each stop, the writers have shared their stories and answered good questions.

Rawan Yaghi and Refaat Alareer in Manhattan

The book includes 23 short stories from young Palestinian writers responding to the 23 days of Israel’s bombardment on the civilians in the Gaza Strip in Dec.’08-Jan. ’09, called Operation Cast Lead. Israel killed more than 1,400 Palestinians, including many women and children. The most shocking and disturbing book I’ve ever read is the Goldstone Report from the U.N. fact-finding mission on the Gaza conflict* and Operation Cast Lead.

Gaza Writes Back should come with a warning message on the cover because it may be difficult for some to read as well.

Refaat Alareer, the Editor of the book, said he decided to ask his university students to try their hand at writing fiction because he knew the therapeutic value of writing. “Writing fiction transcends everything” and “brings us back to our humanity.” He also believes fiction is timeless — connecting the past, present and future.

Rawan, Yousef, Helena, Refaat, Sarah

Refaat knew that his students could speak for themselves. So often the narratives we hear about Israel & Palestine in the mainstream media come from the colonizer’s perspective. It seems Americans can more easily identify with that perspective. Publishing his students’ stories would be a way for Palestinians to go global with their narrative about the horrific events of Operation Cast Lead.

Rawan Yaghi, contributor “Gaza Writes Back”

Interestingly, 12 of the 15 contributors to the book are female, which demonstrates the importance of women and their voices in the culture. They wrote their short stories in English, not Arabic, to reach a larger audience and to educate people outside of Gaza.

Refaat Alareer, Editor “Gaza Writes Back”

Ironically, or perhaps tragically, Gaza Writes Back is available all over the world, but not in Gaza. Refaat has received tweets from people who have read the book in Europe, South Africa, Uganda, Malaysia, Argentina, New Zealand, Jerusalem and the West Bank. Last month, Medea Benjamin (CodePink) was carrying 30 copies of Gaza Writes Back when she tried to reach Gaza, but Egyptian security officials detained her at the Cairo airport, broke her arm, and deported her the following day.

Yousef Aljamal, contributor “Gaza Writes Back”

Despite what the foreign desk of the New York Times believes, the Gaza Strip is occupied 100% — by land, sea and air. Every Palestinian in Gaza has a family member, friend or colleague who was killed or injured during Israel’s Operation Cast Lead.

Refaat notes that the Israelis have been doing the same thing day-after-day, year-after-year, decade-after-decade …. killing, destroying and acts of humiliation targeting Palestinians, the young and old alike.

But Palestinians are very creative in ways of resistance. Writing is resistance. Sharing their narrative with audiences in the USA on this book tour is fighting back.

Helena and Refaat on the road again

* How anyone can call the Israel-Palestine occupation, massacres and oppression — a “conflict” — is beyond me.  An employer & employee can have a conflict. A shopkeeper & customer can have a conflict. A parent & teenager can have a conflict. An oppressor & the oppressed do NOT have a conflict. They have a life of struggle and injustices.

Where is Sarah Ali?

In January 2013, I shared a cab ride across the Sinai desert with a Palestinian professor. He taught English literature at the Islamic University of Gaza but was then working on his PhD at a university in Malaysia. We were headed from Cairo to the border crossing at Rafah, about 250 miles. It was a very long trip. He took a manuscript out of his briefcase and handed it to me.

Actually, this story begins in September 2012 when the publisher of Just World Books heard that I was traveling to Gaza. Helena Cobban contacted me and asked if I would carry some books that had been requested by friends into Gaza. I knew there was no FED EX or postal service into the Gaza Strip. Israel has essentially tightened the screws on 1.8 million people there, and the siege makes normal delivery impossible. So I agreed.

The professor’s manuscript turned out to be the first compilation of short stories written by his students at the Islamic University of Gaza. He was hoping to get them published and he was obviously very proud of his students and very excited about the project.

Low and behold, the publisher who brought his manuscript to life a year later was Helena Cobban of Just World Books. The title they chose was perfect — Gaza Writes Back: Short Stories by Young Writers in Gaza, Palestine.

When I learned there was a book tour planned in the U.S.A. this Spring, I was very excited but also skeptical that the professor/editor or any of the contributors would be able to make it to America. Travel out of Gaza is nearly impossible for most Palestinians, and getting a U.S. Visa is an unfulfilled dream for many.

The publisher and the other sponsor of the book tour — the American Friends Service Committee — succeeded in helping Refaat Alareer (the professor/editor), Yousef Aljamal, Rawan Yaghi, and Sarah Ali (all contributors to the book) to obtain U.S. Visas for their travel. Alhamdulillah!

The logistics seemed to be working out. A month-long tour was planned from the East Coast to the West. Check it out here.

Gaza Strip superimposed on Manhattan, New York

Sadly, Israeli authorities screwed up the plans.

Sarah Ali received a permit from Israel to travel from Gaza to Jerusalem to apply and interview for her U.S. Visa. However, after she received her Visa, Israel would not allow her to travel out of Gaza to Jordan to join her colleagues on tour.

Refaat and Yousef were studying in Malaysia and had no trouble traveling. Rawan was studying in London at Oxford University. The Israeli authorities couldn’t stop her from traveling.

Sarah remains in Gaza, with only a cardboard cut out sitting on stage in her place.

Israel did not allow Sarah Ali (far right) to join her colleagues on the book tour.

 

#Gazawritesback hangs out

Watched a Google Hangout on Thursday at the Gilroy Library with contributors to Gaza Writes Back — a new book published by Just World Books.

Helena Cobban, Publisher

There were participants from many different time zones which boggles the mind.  4:00 PM was a very convenient time for me, but that meant Nour was sitting up at 2:00 AM in Gaza to participate, and others in Malaysia were up at 8:00 PM (the next day I think).  There were participants from London and many other time zones as well.  Difficult for me to comprehend how technology can bring us all together.

Lora watching in Gilroy Library

For me, the best part of this hour with the contributors and editor of Gaza Writes Back was hearing their voices and watching them as they read passages from the book. I felt connected to them in a way that I never could have without this Google Hangout.

Refaat Alareer, Editor, in Malaysia

Refaat teaches at the Islamic University of Gaza. He explained why he invited his English students to write following Israel’s 23-day military operation against Gaza in Dec.’08 – Jan.’09 (Operation Cast Lead).

Nour El Borno, contributor, in Gaza

I think the title of the book is very clever. When I first heard it — Gaza Writes Back — I thought of two things.

Rawan Yaghi, contributor

(1) Writes Back sounds like Fights Back – this book represents the young people (contributors are university students in their 20s) taking up pens instead of swords to respond to the horrific onslaught unleashed by Israel which left more than 1,400 Palestinians dead.

Yousef Aljamal, contributor

(2) There are many activists worldwide trying to bring attention in their countries to the injustices of the Israeli occupation, but Palestinians have their own voices, their own stories. This book is their “wake-up call” to the world, much more real and poignant than any international activist could share.

Jehan Alfarra, contributor

The book includes 23 short stories, and as one writer notes it is “the latest and most dangerous weapon revealed.”

You can order the book here. I sent 3 copies (one each) to my U.S. Senators and Congresswoman. Maybe I should order a copy for President Obama.

If you missed the Google Hangout, you can catch it below.  Just over an hour-long and well worth the time to hear these contributors in their own words.

Dear Heinrich, Udall and Lujan-Grisham

 

US Representative Lujan-Grisham

 

 

 

Senator Tom Udall

US Senator Martin Heinrich

Dear Senator Heinrich (ditto Senator Udall and Congresswoman Lujan-Grisham),

By now, the book I ordered for you should have arrived at your office – GAZA WRITES BACK, Short Stories from Young Writers in Gaza, Palestine, Just World Books, 2013.

Despite your busy schedule of meetings, briefings, and committee hearings, you would be wise to put this book on the top of your pile.

I know you pride yourself in being prepared, doing your homework, and thoughtfully examining issues from all sides before forming your position. I commend you for your diligence.

On the matter of the Middle East, and specifically the Israel-Palestine conflict, Israel obviously has a distorted influence and the power of persuasion over many members of Congress through its well-greased lobbying campaign waged by the American Israel Public Affairs Committee, otherwise known as AIPAC. I wonder how many times you’ve met with AIPAC lobbyists.  Wish I could be a fly on the wall during those meetings.

Do other countries deploy such influential lobbyists in the halls of Congress?  I doubt it.  Certainly, the Palestinians don’t have the resources or the political acumen to compete with the AIPAC minions.

That’s why GAZA WRITES BACK is crucial to your education.

Undoubtedly, much of what you’ve learned about Palestine comes through the distorted lens of AIPAC, the Israeli government, perhaps a Zionist organization spewing well-tested hasbara, or the unquestioning mainstream media.

Have you ever spoken with a Palestinian?

Palestinians are certainly neither monolithic in thought nor unified in their political opinions, just like Americans, but the most relevant voices for the future are those of the Palestinian youth who are well-educated, intellectually curious, and possess wisdom well beyond their years.

GAZA WRITES BACK includes 23 short stories written by young adults from Gaza, most have never left this tiny enclave because of the suffocating Israeli siege. Their stories are written in English, not translated from Arabic, and tell about the ordinary and extraordinary events of life under Occupation.

Israeli leaders have waged a very deliberate campaign since the State of Israel was founded in 1948 to erase the history and memories of the indigenous Palestinians from popular discourse, just as they erased hundreds of Palestinian villages in a matter of months. They have carefully framed the conflict to divert the world’s attention away from the Occupation – you will never hear AIPAC lobbyists speak about the Occupation.

Since the US government is funding Israel’s brutal Occupation – to the tune of over $3 billion each year – you should know what Americans are getting for this investment. AIPAC will tell you “security” but, if you read between the lines, these young Palestinian writers will make you think twice about the impact of American foreign policy in the Middle East.

In their own words, with the clarity of uncensored feelings and dreams, these Palestinians eschewed rockets and stones, and decided to pick up their pens to call for justice. Read their stories. Feel their stories. And then lets talk.